This is an indulgent post. I have no deep, profound thoughts, or messages to share. I just want to gush for a few minutes. Because I can. It’s partly why I started this blog…so that after a magical evening, I can feel free to write whatever (within reason) I wish on here on as long as in the end, there is some good in it. And this, my friends, is VERY GOOD STUFF.

I just returned from a most spectacular evening in Ottawa with my dear friend and neighbor, Anna. Anna is a very talented musician and is currently playing the oboe this season in the National Arts Center Orchestra’s productions of “The Nutcracker”. I was fortunate enough to accompany her to Canada’s capital city tonight so I could see a performance of the ballet.

It was the stuff dreams are made of. I was treated to the beautiful dance stylings of the Royal Winnipeg Ballet. They did not disappoint. The young woman who played Clara danced with such poise and grace and her Nutcracker certainly seemed to come to life as her prince just like the story predicts.

But the Sugar Plum Fairy and her Cavalier stole my breath. As Anna’s three year daughter Sylvie would say, “She, was the prettiest of them all!” And boy was she ever. Her legs appeared to extend to the far corners of the stage and when she would leap into her cavalier’s arms and he’d masterfully catch her just breaths before she’d hit the stage, it made you feel as though maybe for a moment, you were not watching mere mortals up there, but in fact, fairies who could fly.

Tchaikovsky composed some of the most beautiful music of all time when he wrote “The Nutcracker”. The story of Clara and her Nutcracker and this magical adventure he takes her on is so much more than just a silly dream sequence. It’s a chance to see Christmas through the eyes of a child and to see how the many simple joys we often take for granted are so wonderful and beautiful in our day to day lives. The candies, coffee, sugary treats and beautiful decorations and even the guests at a Christmas party can inspire the most glorious dreams for each of us. It’s also a unique love story on so many different levels. You can get swept up in the music and just let it carry you away like the most intricate snowflake. If we’re lucky, we will each have our own Nutcracker come to life and show us all the GOOD things life has to offer. Happiest Holidays to all!

#attheballet

Thanks for an amazing night Anna!! Ttmab!

I haven’t quite known how to broach the subject of sexual harassment and sexual violence all while still keeping this a “positive outlook ” only “GOOD THINGS” blog. But I realized yesterday as I was reading about yet another charge of harassment against a well known public figure, and then read the most courageous post on Facebook by a dear friend of mine about her experience with sexual assault that knowledge is power and empowerment is always a “good thing”.

I have always had a particularly vile reaction to sexual violence ever since finding my freshman year college roommate after she was raped and going through the agonizing process of reporting the rape to the police with her. She would eventually drop out of college and the boy who “took the fall” for the incident did as well although he never served any jail time that I am aware of.

We need to teach our girls to be vigilant. To stand up for themselves and to not accept that it’s ok to be harassed, or made to feel less than. To be objectified or sexualized just because of their gender. That its not because of how short their skirts were or what they were wearing, nobody “asks” to be harassed or assaulted.

We need to teach our boys that women deserve to be respected, protected and cherished. But they do as well. A man and a woman should be equal in every possible way from your friends to your classmates, your colleagues to your life partners. We shouldn’t receive different pay for doing the same jobs, have to dress in a more or less sexualized manner to get a job, and we should all feel safe moving through each phase of our day. From buying our morning coffees, to pumping our gas, and working out after a long day at work. We should all have the freedom and security to exist in a society where women support other women and men respect them.

But too often we are hearing stories of the exact opposite happening. Whether it be from beloved TV hosts and movie stars or from the person sitting next to you on an airplane or on your Facebook feed.

We as women shouldn’t have to feel afraid or embarrassed but instead should feel heard and like there is a clear and safe path to get a job done, or to get…ANYWHERE actually!! And if that path is NOT safe, then rather than suffer and be shamed and made to keep silent, we need to provide these women with a means to speak up and not face persecution for it. Men are not exempt from harassment either. They are all too often the victims of such behavior and even more shunned if they speak up.

We also need to listen. To each other and to men. We need to not let this become the days of the Salem Witch Trials where mass hysteria broke out from a case of group think amongst girls who couldn’t seem to get themselves out of a lie they had created. That may not be a very popular opinion I write there, but it’s an important one and one that we all need to think about. People’s career’s, families, livelihoods, educations and even their freedom are at stake with this #metoo movement and while there are many good parts to #timesup and #metoo and #askhermore there also needs to be a conversation about how it’s being handled on college campuses and how both Men AND Women are being punished by Title IX suits schools are bringing against students without appropriate due process.

No matter what, it has to stop. Any woman who has ever changed the route she was walking or driven out of her way so she wouldn’t have to make that uncomfortable stop to pump her gas or buttoned her coat up extra high and pulled her sweater down as far as it would go so that she wouldn’t get “those looks” knows the feelings I’m talking about.

Anyone who has ever had that feeling like they wish they could take a shower after talking to that particularly creepy boss, co-worker or professor who makes you wonder what you could have possibly spilled down the front of your shirt to so blatantly draw those kind of looks knows what I’m talking about & how important it is to stop this. It’s time we change the culture. We are better than this. We need to expect more from the generations we are raising and from the future men and women of tomorrow. We owe them a GOOD, SAFE, FAIR place to grown, learn and live.

I’m lucky to have grown up in a house with a father and a brother who both love and respect women and hold them in such high regard that I always knew my worth. There are plenty of “GOOD people “ out there. Let’s not let the bad ones ruin it for everyone else.

For Melissa M. & Alicia. Your courage and bravery could move mountains.

#knowledgeispower #metoo #stoptheviolence #nomeansno #equality #survivorsnotvictims #timesup #askhermore

Today is thanksgiving and I am feeling so incredibly grateful this year. Today we drove down to my brother & future sister in law’s apartment in the Ballston Lake area of NY to celebrate the day with them. My Mom and Dad drove down in their car and I drove down separately in mine. I listened to music the whole way and was blissfully happy to be making the trip by myself and feeling so good doing it. This might not seem like a big deal to some people, but today I am reminded of so many Thanksgivings past where things have not been so well.

I’ve spent Thanksgivings freshly out of the hospital recovering from heart surgery, Thanksgivings at friend’s houses in California with my Dad learning how to change my at- home IV out and not being able to eat because my mouth had been wired shut.

I’ve had Thanksgivings where I’ve been recovering from blood clots and some years the day just felt so overwhelming that it was difficult to muster up the strength to go and get showered and dressed let alone celebrate with anyone.

But I always had someone who would make sure I wasn’t alone. My friends and family are amazing that way. I am so thankful to Steve and Roxanne, Frances, Shannon, Kym, Becky and Joe, Cathy and Steve and Amanda and her family for all the years they all made sure I had a place to go and a meal to eat.

This year, I am so thankful that my journey seems to be progressing onward and upward. I’m feeling good, I’m with loved ones, feeling safe, loved and cared for. There is no better feeling in the world than to know there is a place for you to go and people who love you and care about you.

If you are reading this, then know each and every one of you has at least one person out there that cares. I care and you always have a place with me. Everyone have a wonderful holiday and I wish you nothing but GOOD tidings and GREAT food today. Happy Thanksgiving!

Today is a special day. It’s my best buddy Nick’s birthday and it’s also our 1 year anniversary of our friendship. Sometimes people come into our lives for a reason. We don’t always get to know what that reason is, but we know they’re meant to be there.

Nick is someone who was absolutely meant to be not only my friend, but really like my family. See Nick and I actually met when we went out on a date. We hit it off and went on a few more. I enjoyed his company, & he thought I was really nice, actually maybe a little “too nice”, (I bought him a pair of new sheets after knowing him two weeks because he ripped his other pair and you just can’t sleep on ripped sheets!!) At the end of the day, we found ourselves really just enjoying hanging out together.

We decided not to date but to just be “good friends”. It was an awesome decision. The best decision really. He has become one of my most trusted confidants, consigliere, giver of advice, and all around favorite people to hang out with.

Nick is a fellow lover of life but he has had his own trials just as I’ve had mine. 2007 was a big year for him like it was for me, so neither of us think it’s a coincidence that we’ve come in to each other’s lives 10 years later.

We had a conversation not long ago about the concept of “soul circles”. It’s an idea that in each life we live there are certain souls who link together in an almost familial way. Sometimes they are together for the purpose of paying off debts from lifetimes past and sometimes they just stick together because there is such a deep connection there, the souls can’t bear to separate. I have been blessed to find this connection with a few people in my lifetime and I know with utmost certainty that Nick is one of them. He is without a doubt one of the “GOOD ONES”.

#bestiesfortheresties #happybirthdayfriend #fromMeredithtoo

“I’ll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Years Day”

-Taylor Swift

This weekend I have really thought about what it means to “celebrate life”. It’s a phrase I find myself using frequently and with this being the one year anniversary of starting my blog, I thought it might be a “GOOD” subject to delve into further.

I think it’s important to acknowledge that there are many different ways we can “celebrate life” and for different reasons. When the 10 year anniversary of my accident just passed, I celebrated being alive and having the rest of my life ahead of me. I was thankful to have survived and also for the challenges I had been able to overcome in those 10 years of life. So I celebrated those things almost like one would a birthday, with friends, champagne, dinner and laughs.

But “celebrating life” goes beyond just the physical life. This weekend we celebrated the lives of two wonderful women with a memorial concert at “The Crane School of Music”. Dr. Heather Eyerly and Dr. Rebecca Reames were professors at Crane and both passed away in the Spring & Summer of 2017. Both women had prestigious careers in music education and each led different choirs over the years. To paraphrase remarks made by Michael Sitton, The Dean of Music at Crane, who said, the students they touched in their lifetime will now go on to spread the lessons they learned to their students and those students will do the same, helping their legacy ALWAYS live on. THAT is a true way to celebrate a person’s meaningful life if you ask me.

And then there is the other part of “Celebrating Life”. When my good friend from college, who I saw this weekend, courageously beat cancer, we celebrated her strength, her life force and the life that was saved.

To all my friends who have courageously beat cancer or something like it, survived an accident or an attack, are living with an illness of some sort (be it physical, mental or emotional), or have supported someone who has, we celebrate YOUR life!

Another friend of mine finally had the strength to leave a bad marriage that was really unhealthy. After almost 10 years of living in Texas she moved to New York City and is now engaged again to a great guy…and CELEBRATING LIFE!!

To all my expectant and new mom friends out there (you know who you are). There is no bigger life to celebrate than that of a new baby!! I want first dibs on all kisses, cuddles and snuggles!! You are heroes and we celebrate you for it.

Whether it’s a new job you’re pursuing, a move to a new city or house or that new health & wellness plan that you’re giving your all to right now, be sure you’re celebrating your body, your soul and ultimately your life. We all have something wonderful that makes each day worth it. A friend of mine put it best when he recently said “Life is so fragile. Remember the things that matter… the priorities. Don’t take them for granted, and hug your loved ones.” It’s really GOOD advice.

#singitonbim #haveastand

    Today is a good day. Today I celebrate life. If you’ve ever seen the Broadway musical “The Color Purple”, there is a part at the end of the show where the main character, Celie, sings out at the end of her big song, “I’m thankful for each day that I’m given. Both the easy and the hard ones I’m livin’. But most of all, I’m thankful for, lovin’ who I really am. I’m beautiful, yes I’m beautiful and I’m here!!” 
    Today I very much feel that way. Ten years ago today my life was irrevocably changed when I was hit by a drunk driver who was traveling the wrong way down a one way freeway. That set into motion a series of events that would eventually lead me to where I am today. I am a changed woman. A woman whose life was spared. I have been broken, disfigured, humbled, beaten down, and at times stripped of my dignity. But then like a phoenix rising from the ash, I have been artfully reconstructed, repaired, restored, loved and encouraged. I’ve come back stronger than ever and have been given so much and learned so many powerful lessons along the way. Things like forgiveness, compassion, patience and the gift of time. Also not to take a day or a smile for granted. 

   I can’t quite say I am grateful for crossing paths with that man in the early morning hours of November 3rd, 2007, but I am very blessed that my angels were looking out for me that day and for the lessons I learned along the way. 

    For the kindness and incredible care shown to me by my amazing friends and family both in the days immediately following and in the years to come, I am so thankful. You bathed me, housed me, changed my IV’s and told me I would be alright even on my darkest days. I am grateful and I am here. 

   For my body and it’s incredible ability to bounce back from the brink of destruction and to rebuild itself into the true miracle of a shell I always knew was there. I was told shortly afterwards that the impact I withstood was similar to that of a 10 pound bowling ball being dropped on someone’s face standing from 10 feet directly above them. Every bone in my face was broken. All but one of my teeth were affected by the trauma of the accident. What a magnificent vessel the human body is. It can repair itself after just about anything. I am grateful for it. And I’m here. 

    To my doctors and nurses, PA’s and caregivers alike. You are the true heroes of this story. As the sign on my maxillofacial plastic surgeon’s office so accurately stated, he was “all the king’s horses and all the king’s men”, because he sure knew how to put Humpty Dumpty back together again. The miracles of modern medicine are truly a wonderful thing. I went from a girl whose close friends didn’t recognize her in the days following the accident to a woman most people I meet now don’t know a thing ever happened to. I am so grateful. And I am here. 

   And for the times that seemed almost too much to bear, the toothless, painful, soul crushing, indignant experiences that made me feel like I wasn’t sure I could get through it. Looking back, I now see that it was all a lesson in patience. And at the end of the day, I am grateful. I am good. I am beautiful. And I’m here. 

    Two years ago today I did something pretty amazing. Not by myself, it took a team. A small “village” of medical professionals if you will, but I made medical history. Two years ago, I had a life saving procedure to eradicate the blood clots that had formed in a major blood vessel near my heart. During this procedure, the doctor saw an opportunity to “push the boundaries” of both medicine and science (not just for the sake of research) but also for the sake of getting me the best possible outcome from that procedure, as it was the second one I had had in as many months. When he “informed me” of his intentions to go further than we had planned (yes, I was awake during this entire ordeal), I will admit, a part of me was scared SHITLESS! Another part of me however, was REALLY PUMPED!! We were going to go where no one had ever gone before (medically speaking). And it could either go REALLY well, and I would be potentially “fixed” and others could learn from this and also be helped in the future, or…

   Or…yeah. And then I thought about the other part. That’s when my surgeon said to me, “Miranda, I’m losing you here. Why are you making that face?” I not so calmly responded with, “Because I’m trying not to FREAK OUT!!!” He then gave me a little speech about “being brave and how sometimes we have to face our fears head on.” He told me to imagine I was a fierce warrior (I picked Katniss from “The Hunger Games”), and to pretend that I was just picking off my opponents one by one with a bow and arrow each time he needed me to focus on giving him feedback as he would inflate and deflate the balloons and the pressure felt too much to bear. We worked through the process together. Then he had his nurse Brad snow me with a nice strong sedative after the hard part was over. I was very grateful for that too. 

   I will always be so satisfied in knowing that not only did that procedure work to help me, but because it was written up in medical journals it helped others. Like so many other “firsts”, it went on to be a model for how to proceed in cases similar to mine. I know that every ounce of fear or pain I felt was worth it if it means someone else has as equally great an outcome as I did. The best part was, the procedure was successful long term too and I no longer suffer from blood clots in my superior vena cava. I still visit my doctors in New York City about once a year, but now, rather than the desperate and depressing visits I used to have, I now look forward to telling them how well I’m doing and to get that feedback about how great everything looks. 

    As a parting thought to leave you with, I’ll just say that medical research is a wonderful, life saving thing that has absolutely altered my life on more than one occasion. I have had the pleasure of working with some of the best surgeons in the country and arguably the world both as a patient and a staff member over the last 15 years. I have also been part of numerous research studies as a patient and would encourage anyone who has the opportunity to do so to participate in one. It’s how we learn about new & improved ideas, new treatments and new plans of care amongst other things. 

  So two years ago I kinda won “The Hunger Games”. And it was a really awesome, cool, amazing, hard fought and GOOD thing. 

   Have you ever heard the adage “act your age?” Well I’m 36…today. It’s my birthday. Yes, this is a post with a shameless birthday plug in it. Yet even though I may be on the other side of my “mid thirties” now, I’m frequently told, “You don’t look your age!!” Or “I never would have guessed you were THAT old!” 

   Well, there’s a few reasons for that. No, it’s not because I’ve found the fountain of youth or any amazing “quick fix”, but I have had a few things happen that have helped me “reset the clock” so to speak. 

   Anyone who knows my story knows I’ve had (as they say in Hollywood), “some work done”. Don’t get me wrong, the mountain of plastic surgery I’ve had was not my choice…it was all the result of necessary reconstructive surgery following a traumatic car accident, but none the less, I ended up with a “new and improved” face that set me back in the aging process approximately 10 years. Now people generally think I’m someone who has just gotten out of graduate school rather than a woman planning her 15th college reunion this summer. 

    But I’ve learned over time that age truly IS just a number. I have body parts that feel FAR older than my 36 years (did I mention I have a pacemaker??) My 91 year old grandmother doesn’t even have a pacemaker!! And some of the medications I’ve had to take over the years have had some PRETTY gnarly side effects, (bruising, loss of bone density, even my hair suffered at one point), but overall my body at 36 is probably in the best shape it’s ever been in. 

    I feel good, I have energy, I’ve finally learned what and how to eat for my body. I also do things like drink water, exercise for my body type, & do other things it needs too. 

   The “three S’s” are very important for a happy & healthy life. They are Sunlight, Sex and Sleep. You need all three of them (in moderation of course), but that combination can go a long way to keeping you young and feeling your best self. 

   I recently read an article with talk show hosts Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford where they were talking about living their best lives at the ages they were now. Hoda just adopted a baby girl for the first time at age 52. And Kathie Lee remarked how she is feeling open to dating again after losing her husband Frank two years ago. She’s in her mid ’60’s. Neither of them has ever been happier and both feel they “hit their stride” much later in life. They are both beautiful women who wear their age well and are clearly very comfortable with where they are in life. 

    People ask me all the time about my time living in San Diego. And I tell them, “I loved it. It was amazing and a wonderful experience but I wouldn’t go back and relive my ’20’s again.” There was nothing “wrong with them”, it’s just that life has really only gotten better. I have to think that “the good stuff” is just going to continue to progress from here. Like good wine, I feel like I keep getting better with age. So bring it on 36!! I’m ready for you!! You’re gonna be a GREAT year!! 

#thisis36

      I don’t think it’s any secret that I think woman are great. I by no means think we are a “superior sex” or anything, but I definitely have “love for my sisters”. So when I happened to be flipping through the television the other evening and saw a playback of an event that took place earlier in the day on CNN with anchor Brooke Baldwin, I was not only shocked and outraged, but really proud too. Brooke was interviewing two guests about sports anchor, Jemele Hill’s controversial comments on ESPN earlier in the week.    

    One of the guests she had on, a man by the name of Clay Travis, stunned Ms Baldwin by saying, and I quote, “I believe in the first amendment and boobs”. Now you may be thinking what I have to assume she was thinking, what I was thinking and what most people in their right mind were probably thinking…”Who is this guy, & who says BOOBS on national television in 2017? What are you 12 years old??” So when Brooke made the decision to cut his mic a few moments later, not only was it extremely gratifying, but it just felt like the right thing to do.    

     Nothing good comes from objectifying women and if his intention was to make her feel uncomfortable or belittled, he didn’t achieve it. He only succeeded in pissing off the host (and the other panelist for that matter) and making himself look like an unintelligent neanderthal who had the vocabulary of a 7th grader. Brooke came out looking polished, cool headed and had loads of support from friends and fans all over the country. In the end, she made him look like a total boob. 

    In other news regarding women I think totally kick ass, actress and singer Selena Gomez recently shared that she underwent a kidney transplant this summer. Her donor was none other than her best friend and fellow actress Francia Raisa. The girls have been friends since they were teenagers. When it became clear that Gomez was going to need a transplant as a result of complications having to do with the autoimmune disease Lupus from which she suffers, Raisa immediately got tested and considered it “an honor” to be able to help her friend and “sister”. 

     I have friends who I know would do the same for me if this situation ever were to arise (& of course, I would for them as well if the option were there), so I know just what a big deal this is. Francia went on to bring awareness to Lupus in a social media post of the two girls following the surgery and provided a link to a website where people could learn more about Lupus and even donate to the site if they would like to support people suffering from the disease. I will always take the time to highlight women helping each other. Especially when they are best friends and lives are being saved. That is a perfect example of justthegoodstuff. 

http://www.lupusresearch.org

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2017/09/15/opinions/espn-and-women-in-2017-brooke-baldwin-opinion/index.html