I was at dinner the other evening with my Mom, future sister-in-law, and her parents down in North Carolina when I excused myself to go to the ladies room. When I was in there, a young woman was in the stall next to me getting sick. I felt badly for her, but when I went out to wash my hands, I heard her friend come in to check on her. It quickly became apparent there was much more going on than just an upset stomach. She was bright red when she shakily emerged from the stall and her eyes were nearly swollen shut. She was clearly having an allergic reaction to something and started to comment on how she felt like it was getting difficult to breathe.

That’s when I knew I had step in. I’m not a medical professional by any means. I have no license to practice medicine and don’t pretend that I know all the answers. But I do have common sense and know when someone is in need of some help. Her friend looked slightly panicked and was quite relieved when I came over and introduced myself and said, “don’t worry, we’re going to get you some help.” She smiled back at me and clearly was in need of someone to say “it’s going to be ok” and mean it.

I have too often been the person on the receiving end of the kindness of strangers when a crisis has occurred. I can remember fainting in public many times in the months leading up to my heart surgery and waking up in a fit of tears (which was my typical reaction to this situation) and some kind person holding my hand and telling me it was “all going to be ok”. There really is no better medicine than kind eyes and a hand holding yours giving you comfort. Remaining calm and collected can be tough in these high stress situations, but it is so important for the person in need. Nothing good ever comes from whipping things up and panicking. I once even had a doctor agree to change his connecting flight home and accompany me on the final leg of my trip when I became incapacitated in an airport and needed someone to monitor me. Due to the extreme circumstances, I wasn’t able to properly thank him, but I think of him every time I fly and what a tremendous inconvenience it was for him to do that and how incredibly grateful I was and still am to him. He truly “saved my day” and by extension maybe even my life.

In the end, I was able to help the young woman in the bathroom the other evening. Her friend came and found me at my table after things had settled down and thanked me. The manager of the restaurant even comp’d my meal as a gesture of thanks for helping out. It took maybe 15 minutes out of my night and it definitely gave me that satisfaction of knowing that I had helped someone in need and had done a GOOD thing just as others had done for me in the past. What goes around comes around and what you put out will surely come back to you, so be sure to make it only GOOD STUFF.

She had small creases when she smiled and crow’s feet in the corners of her eyes almost as if the wisdom and wonder of each year were dancing across her face and leaving tiny little footprints in its path.

Her skin had begun to stretch and soften ever so slightly. It felt velvety smooth but still held its shape quite well. She had stretch marks. Almost resembling tiger stripes. But they had faded so that you had to look really close to see them…but she knew they were there.

Each scar on her body (and there were many), was like a tattoo of the battles she had fought and won. “Battle-scars” in the truest sense of the word.

Her body held a tan quite nicely but also some of those same sunspots and freckles that come from overindulging in the Vitamin D rays.

Her hair surely had gray salt and peppered into it, but the highlights and hair dye of the past 20 years had covered it.

Her curls which she had once sought to straighten every day, were bouncing back to life and springing in time with each step she took.

She didn’t routinely wear makeup anymore. On special occasions maybe a swipe of mascara, some eyeliner and a dab of concealer but her cheeks were so naturally rosy she always looked a bit blushed.

She looked quite a bit younger than her 36 years but some of this was not nature’s doing. Instead, she owed her gratitude to the magical hands of a pair of reconstructive surgeons who were tasked with putting her back together after she had cracked like an egg from the sheer force of a trauma.

Her body frame was petite in all ways. Her muscles were strong and lean. Her breasts were small, but fit her body and she didn’t mind them. Her butt still had a nice curve to it and her thighs still gave her that angst she suffered from as a teenager even if they didn’t touch anymore. Some things just leave an imprint on our psyche no matter what age or how fit we are.

But she was beautiful. Because she was happy. And like any good gardener will tell you, if you feed and water something and give it sunlight it will grow and be healthy. And she was.

The inside of her was the best part. It was made of love, and laughter and a lot of other really GOOD STUFF.

I’ve been reflecting on what a great this year has been. This has been a very GOOD year with lots of GREAT things packed into it.

First, I gained a second best friend. See technically I have two, but they’re both ok with that. There is Kym, whom I’ve had for 14 years and will cherish forever. Then there’s Nick. Nick came into my life at the end of last year but really became my best friend at the beginning of this year. He is a blessing and I cherish him so. (You can read about Nick in my blog titled “Blessed With The Best” )

In February I met my cousins, Rachel and Ali in Nashville and we had a “Girl’s Weekend” there and after my flight got cancelled and I got stranded an extra day in “Music City”, I met two new friends, “Nashville Nick” & his friend Johnny. We’ve stayed in touch and I got a text from “Nashville Nick” yesterday to wish me a Happy New Year. (Read “For Armani” on this blog to re-live my weekend with the girls.)

In March I continued my journeys and ventured up to Montreal on the train for the first time. My desire to go and see new places was only growing and continues to grow now. At the end of March, my brother proposed to Candice and now I’m going to have a SISTER come this February. (You can read about Candice in the blog called “Times Not Up”.)

April was cherry blossom season and I finally went to see them with my dear friend Emily in Washington DC. We had a FANTASTIC time!! Em even did a little extra cardio and carried me up three flights of stairs piggyback style. But that’s another story. (Check out the blog titled “I’ve Got Your Back” to read about that.)

It was also the month I spent almost entirely with my friend Deb. Deb is and was a real beautiful addition to my group of friends. We spent as much time together as we could as she was leaving to move to Rochester in May, so although our time together was brief, it was meaningful and wonderful. (The blog “It’s So Hard To Say Goodbye” explores how I felt about Deb and how sad I was for her to go, but how grateful I am to have met her.)

May was the month my Mom retired. It was kinda a big deal. I should also mention that my Dad retired in January. I’m so very proud of all the work they’ve done over the years and especially the difference they both made at my Alma Mater, SUNY Potsdam. (Read “Those Who Can Teach” to read more about my Mom. )

June was when “wedding season” as I call it, was in FULL BLOOM and off to NYC we went for wedding dress shopping for Candice and a Met’s Game for Father’s Day. (Read the blog “DLG” for more thoughts on my wonderful Dad. )

In July, I got to reconnect with several friends from lots of different times and places in my life for one reason or another. That is always such a wonderful blessing and I was grateful for the opportunity.

It was also the month I made a commitment to get in shape. I was going to Europe with my best friend Kym in a few weeks and wanted to be able to keep up with her, so I made an effort to get as fit as possible for that trip. There wasn’t an ounce of vanity in that decision for once in my life. (Read my blog, “In This Skin” for more. Also “Reflections Of The Way Life Used To Be” for more on reconnecting.)

August I was off to Europe. Kym and I first went and saw our friend Becky get married in The UK and then off we went to Bavaria. (Read “Love Always Wins” for thoughts on Becky & Joe’s wedding.)

Kym and I then went through Germany, Austria and took a little unintended jaunt through Italy before wrapping our sensational two weeks up and parting ways as she drove the Mercedes away and I Uber’d to the airport to fly back to London to finish up my trip & headed home to The States. (Check out “How Lucky Are We?” for details of the #bestfriendtour2017)

September had me traveling to North Carolina to meet my future sister in law’s family and then found me turning a year older. I turned 36 on September 25th and welcomed it as I felt healthy, happy and content in my life. (Read “Age Is Just A Number” for my birthday blog.)

October had me coming down to the Albany area a few times for some wedding/girls weekends with Candice and also to Burlington, VT with my friend Karen for some doctor’s appointments that we accompany each other to. (Read the Post “Still I Rise” for how I feel about Karen and her strength through this entire experience.)

November brought us Thanksgiving at my brother’s house this year and it was a special one. He and Candice did most of the cooking and we are all in the final push for this wedding now. (Read “Thankful? Indeed” for my thoughts on that particular Thanksgiving day.)

December was a full month!! I went and saw my friend Ryan in Colorado in the middle of the month. I had never been to Colorado before and just LOVED it!! (Check out “GET OUTSIDE, TRAVEL AND LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST” if you want to read more about that trip.)

Then Christmas was of course at the very end of the month. We had Matt & Candice up with us for Christmas as we had gone down to them for Thanksgiving. (Read my blog called “What Would Mary Do” to get my thoughts on Christmas this year.)

And now we’re brought back to New Year’s 2018. Where I spent it with my best friend Nick and my parents. We ate dinner together and then all watched the Buffalo Bills make the playoffs for the first time since I was a teenager and then toasted the ball drop at midnight. A perfect way to say “goodbye” to a GOOD year and “hello” to a really GREAT one.

(Check out any of the other blogs not mentioned in this post but definitely worth reading on this site and thanks for reading!)

#HappyNewYear