Have you ever heard the adage “act your age?” Well I’m 36…today. It’s my birthday. Yes, this is a post with a shameless birthday plug in it. Yet even though I may be on the other side of my “mid thirties” now, I’m frequently told, “You don’t look your age!!” Or “I never would have guessed you were THAT old!” 

   Well, there’s a few reasons for that. No, it’s not because I’ve found the fountain of youth or any amazing “quick fix”, but I have had a few things happen that have helped me “reset the clock” so to speak. 

   Anyone who knows my story knows I’ve had (as they say in Hollywood), “some work done”. Don’t get me wrong, the mountain of plastic surgery I’ve had was not my choice…it was all the result of necessary reconstructive surgery following a traumatic car accident, but none the less, I ended up with a “new and improved” face that set me back in the aging process approximately 10 years. Now people generally think I’m someone who has just gotten out of graduate school rather than a woman planning her 15th college reunion this summer. 

    But I’ve learned over time that age truly IS just a number. I have body parts that feel FAR older than my 36 years (did I mention I have a pacemaker??) My 91 year old grandmother doesn’t even have a pacemaker!! And some of the medications I’ve had to take over the years have had some PRETTY gnarly side effects, (bruising, loss of bone density, even my hair suffered at one point), but overall my body at 36 is probably in the best shape it’s ever been in. 

    I feel good, I have energy, I’ve finally learned what and how to eat for my body. I also do things like drink water, exercise for my body type, & do other things it needs too. 

   The “three S’s” are very important for a happy & healthy life. They are Sunlight, Sex and Sleep. You need all three of them (in moderation of course), but that combination can go a long way to keeping you young and feeling your best self. 

   I recently read an article with talk show hosts Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford where they were talking about living their best lives at the ages they were now. Hoda just adopted a baby girl for the first time at age 52. And Kathie Lee remarked how she is feeling open to dating again after losing her husband Frank two years ago. She’s in her mid ’60’s. Neither of them has ever been happier and both feel they “hit their stride” much later in life. They are both beautiful women who wear their age well and are clearly very comfortable with where they are in life. 

    People ask me all the time about my time living in San Diego. And I tell them, “I loved it. It was amazing and a wonderful experience but I wouldn’t go back and relive my ’20’s again.” There was nothing “wrong with them”, it’s just that life has really only gotten better. I have to think that “the good stuff” is just going to continue to progress from here. Like good wine, I feel like I keep getting better with age. So bring it on 36!! I’m ready for you!! You’re gonna be a GREAT year!! 

#thisis36

      I don’t think it’s any secret that I think woman are great. I by no means think we are a “superior sex” or anything, but I definitely have “love for my sisters”. So when I happened to be flipping through the television the other evening and saw a playback of an event that took place earlier in the day on CNN with anchor Brooke Baldwin, I was not only shocked and outraged, but really proud too. Brooke was interviewing two guests about sports anchor, Jemele Hill’s controversial comments on ESPN earlier in the week.    

    One of the guests she had on, a man by the name of Clay Travis, stunned Ms Baldwin by saying, and I quote, “I believe in the first amendment and boobs”. Now you may be thinking what I have to assume she was thinking, what I was thinking and what most people in their right mind were probably thinking…”Who is this guy, & who says BOOBS on national television in 2017? What are you 12 years old??” So when Brooke made the decision to cut his mic a few moments later, not only was it extremely gratifying, but it just felt like the right thing to do.    

     Nothing good comes from objectifying women and if his intention was to make her feel uncomfortable or belittled, he didn’t achieve it. He only succeeded in pissing off the host (and the other panelist for that matter) and making himself look like an unintelligent neanderthal who had the vocabulary of a 7th grader. Brooke came out looking polished, cool headed and had loads of support from friends and fans all over the country. In the end, she made him look like a total boob. 

    In other news regarding women I think totally kick ass, actress and singer Selena Gomez recently shared that she underwent a kidney transplant this summer. Her donor was none other than her best friend and fellow actress Francia Raisa. The girls have been friends since they were teenagers. When it became clear that Gomez was going to need a transplant as a result of complications having to do with the autoimmune disease Lupus from which she suffers, Raisa immediately got tested and considered it “an honor” to be able to help her friend and “sister”. 

     I have friends who I know would do the same for me if this situation ever were to arise (& of course, I would for them as well if the option were there), so I know just what a big deal this is. Francia went on to bring awareness to Lupus in a social media post of the two girls following the surgery and provided a link to a website where people could learn more about Lupus and even donate to the site if they would like to support people suffering from the disease. I will always take the time to highlight women helping each other. Especially when they are best friends and lives are being saved. That is a perfect example of justthegoodstuff. 

http://www.lupusresearch.org

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2017/09/15/opinions/espn-and-women-in-2017-brooke-baldwin-opinion/index.html

For New Yorkers 

And Americans…the world united as one. 

As the planes soared through the crystal blue sky we couldn’t believe what we seeing before our eyes. 

It changed us forever. 

We came together, sometimes by the bus load from cities far and wide to help. 

Neighbors consoled each other and strangers lent a helping hand. 

First responders tirelessly worked to sift through the rubble. 

For the innocent and brave men and women who lost their lives that day. 

We as a nation prayed 

And mourned 

And again United 

Nothing seemed GOOD that day. But we as a country showed just how GREAT we can be when we are put to the test. 

We are the land of the free and the home of the brave. And boy, are we brave. 

** This is for Pete Owens and all the others who were lost that day. You are never forgotten. 

#neverforget

     I recently had the pleasure of accompanying a good friend to a doctor’s appointment. The appointment was several hours away from where we live so it made it difficult for her to drive herself given her current medical condition and so I offered to take her. We have a lot in common as we both share a particular genetic condition that we were born with. It’s actually how we became friends. To make a long story short, we ended up being linked together when we were both seeing the same provider who recommended we reach out to one another as we were of similar age and had quite a lot in common, both physically but also with what we were dealing with emotionally as a result of our physical challenges.

     It was a bit of a puzzle trying to initially connect, but once we did, the pieces all fell into place and we became really close friends. I adore her husband and son, I’ve been to her childhood home overseas and I am now good friends with her sister.  She’s gotten to know my family quite well too, coming over for dinner with my parents and has met my brother and his fiancé as well, even helping to pick out my bridesmaid dress for their wedding. 

     But the respect I have for her not just as my friend, but a person living with an invisible illness/injury that not everyone can see is ENORMOUS. Because I have one too. And yet, still I rise. Each day we both get out of bed and look as normal as the next person walking down the street. We put our makeup on, do our hair and put our posh little outfits on to go about the day. But often those days are filled with pain. Not just “aches and pains” like you hear about in the Tylenol commercial, but CHRONIC PAIN. Debilitating pain that could put a 250 gorilla on his back. 

      Yet still we rise. Because we have things to do and appointments to go to. Bills to pay, and things that need to be sorted and “sussed out”. My friend is the mum to a 19 month old toddler so she can’t very easily just crawl back into bed when she doesn’t feel well. Listening to her describe her history to the doctor yesterday (although I’d already heard the story and could probably have told him it in detail myself), made me realize truly what a long journey it’s been for her. But we were given hope yesterday. Hope that still, we may rise.

      I know there are many people in my life (& out there in general) who suffer from “invisible illness” whether that is in the form of an autoimmune condition, a genetic condition, a neurological one, a mental illness, psychological or emotional pain, or some other source of pain, fatigue and compromised wellness. Some have chronic pain or illness or a myriad of other things that make it almost impossible to contemplate getting out of bed each day. And yet we do. 

    Like the phoenix rising from the ash, breaking through the pain and pushing through to the other side, we keep moving forward. We do it because in the end, it’s what is GOOD and we still rise. 

#invisibleillness

#stillirise

     Tim McGraw wrote an awesome song a couple years ago called “Humble and Kind”. It’s basically a rule book for life. It goes over the basics about how to treat others, the “shoulds and shouldn’ts” you need to know when navigating most adult situations but really a lot of the things are lessons you might have learned in Kindergarten. 

    Things like, “Call your momma every chance you get. Don’t steal, don’t cheat and don’t lie.” And at the end of the day, be humble and kind.     

    I went to a Zac Brown Band Concert the other night and it was my third year in a row attending the show. The one thing I noticed this year, more than others was the lack of graciousness from a lot of the youth at the concert. I have always found concerts to be very fun occasions where I meet people to dance and bond with and occasionally, I’ll meet someone like this woman Paula from last night whose daughter was just as sweet as could be and when I noticed her trying to get a good picture of her sitting on Paula’s husband’s shoulders, I snapped one with my camera, tossed it through a filter and then offered to email it to her. We kinda bonded after that and danced together the rest of the evening and she sent me a really sweet email this am saying how nice it was to hang out last night. 

    But I noticed that there was a certain group of girls all around the same age especially who all dressed the same, and had no regard for who they barged past. If they stepped on someone’s things, they didn’t have a care in the world and my sister, Candice had her foot stomped on twice!! It just seemed like the old fashioned concert etiquette I was raised with had gone out the door and was replaced with a sense of entitlement and young, hipster, snobbery. It’s really too bad & kinda ruins things for everyone. 

    Anytime anyone asks me what the best concert I’ve ever been to is, it’s an easy answer for me… Fleetwood Mac. They were amazing when I saw them out in San Diego closed to 10 years ago now. So it’s no surprise that lead singer Stevie Nicks authored one of my favorite quotes of all time. She said once in an interview, “Your graciousness is what carries you. It isn’t how old you are, how young you are, how beautiful you are, or how short your skirt is. What it is is what comes out of your heart. If you are gracious, you have won the game.” 

   These girls last night could really stand to learn this lesson as it will not only carry them far in their future concert going experiences, but in life in general too. Being gracious, humble and kind are three of the greatest attributes I think a person can have, & if you are lucky enough to possess all three, you have TRULY WON THE GAME. And it is a MIGHTY GOOD THING. 

#homegrown #grateful&gracious #humble&kind