The first person is a one off. The second, seems like a really awful coincidence, but the third, fourth, and fifth? That starts to make it a pattern. I’m talking about cancer. And not just any cancer…breast cancer. I’ve had at least a half dozen friends who have been diagnosed with it before their 40th birthday. Pardon my French, but breast cancer is a motherfucker and needs to have its ass kicked. 

    Cancer is a monster I, personally have never had to fight. But I’ve watched it. I’ve seen it up close. I’ve seen it wage it’s battle. Fight it’s dirty, nasty fight. No holds barred and no rules it won’t break. I’ve also seen it destroyed. I’ve watched loved ones obliterate it. Fight back with every ounce of strength they had and become the victor in the most important of the lives…the battle FOR their lives. It’s not easy, but it becomes necessary. 

    And for those of us on the sidelines, what can we do? How can we help? When I got the news one of my dearest friends was given her diagnosis just the other day, I immediately reached out to our group from college. How can we help? What can WE do? Love suddenly becomes not adequate enough. So you close ranks, & a support system is born. You try to figure out how you can best help. Is it meals, or maid service, mileage for travel that families will inevitably need covered or just a helping hand for bills. The idea is to show that no matter what, support comes at NO COST and that it’s just what you would want someone to do for you. 

    And for the person who is receiving the care, well I can tell you this much. This becomes a time when nobody needs a hero. It’s ok to just say “yes” and accept whatever help is offered to you. Sometimes it’s what blessings are all about. Take those meals offered. Freeze whatever will keep and then make plans to eat the others in as timely a manner as possible. Food is food and if it’s something you don’t have to make yourself, then it’s a win for everyone. Any help offered for cleaning, childcare, or other services like that is completely up to you, but shouldn’t be looked at as a burden. If they are helpful, by all means, take them & use them to your full advantage. This is all about you & your focus should be on healing & your body. Again it’s not always easy, but it’s what is necessary. Fight the good fight, and then lean back and just be supported. 

    Survivors, fighters, warriors passed. Know you are loved. YOU are the heroes. You are the women & men with the battle scars to prove what the “good fight” is all about. And we salute you. For my dear friend who is just about to embark on this journey, you have my heart, my love and my strength. You are one tough lady and if anyone was going to show Cancer who’s boss, it’s you!! You are just GOOD STUFF!!